Well, until the Police shut them down.

There was a giveaway of £20,000 worth of fuel in a petrol station in Finsbury Park, London today.

It was all in aid of promoting a new game - Mercenaries 2: World in Flames by EA. In the game, there’s a high demand for fuel (Well, it being 2010, I assume it would be), so queues and frustration would build up around it.

That’s exactly what happened. Word spread quickly, and queues of cars lasting about half a mile were created just to get into the petrol station. It caused chaos with bus timetables, school runs and just normal people passing through the area. Some waited for three quarters of an hour just to get free fuel. To be honest, so would I in the state the market’s in right now.

So much chaos had been committed, the Police had to intervene and shut the station down after just under £10,000 worth of fuel had been given away. Spoilsports, or just ordering the peace?

It certainly got people to notice the game, anyway. Most people were saying they would buy a copy of the game just to say thanks. Who wouldn’t like a woman dressed in battle gear giving them free fuel? I know I wouldn’t complain.

I made a blog post late last week about Um Bongo not being sold anymore, thanks to a YouTube campaign started by Dominic and Alex. Their thoughts were that Um Bongo was only available to people using Ocado (An online shopping thing, which is really expensive for what it is). Well, they’re wrong.

See, my sister read my blog. She told me that she was sure she had seen it in ASDA (A lot cheaper place to buy food than Ocado) and she’d get us some next time she saw it (That was a lot of S’s in that sentence). And she did. So I am now drinking the sunny funny one they call Um Bongo.

But it’s not the same. I mean, the advert used to claim “A humble concoction of nine fruits”, but the box now just claims to contain only 3 - Orange, Pinapple and Banana. As a result, it’s just not as awesome. Give me some reason to call this campaign off. They’ve gone back to the standard straws too. Rubbish.

So I don’t care if they still sell *a* version of Um Bongo in one supermarket. I want the real classic, bigger carton, with 9 fruits in it. Sort it out. Get it in Tesco, too. I don’t want to pay proper sorts of money for it! Fool.

1. The new Year 12s like the smell of men in the changing rooms.

2. There’s some strange adverts at the bottom of S-Cool A-Level at the moment.  

3. Nobody has heard of ‘The Thin Blue Line’.

4. Steve Kay has trouble steering.

5. American Football cheerleaders have their own football league.

Perhaps the most surreal song in the history of ever.

This song has been stuck in my head ever since I accidentally came across it on YouTube when looking at someone’s videos. I sent it to Siobhan, because it seems like the sort of thing she’d love. Now I can’t stop listening to it.

I’ve played it so many times, I was hoping I’d get sick of it and it’d just fall out of my head. I usually do that to songs in my head - Stick them somewhere like on my MySpace profile - that usually does the trick.

But how can you not love singing baby eggs?

It’s no secret. I was looking forward to O2 releasing the Pay as you Go iPhone.

I don’t like being tied down by contracts. I had to fight Xbox technical support to make them let go of my sister’s card information once I used it to buy some Microsoft points. If they’d kept it, as soon as my Live subscription ran out, they’d just use whatever they can to give me 12 months more, even if it means taking the information they have from a completely separate transaction to do so.

With my experience with the iPod touch - Perhaps the most amazing iPod ever - and the fact that “Financing differences” made me pay to keep updating the thing lead me to the conclusion that my next phone will be a Pay as you Go iPhone and life would be sweet. Not so.

An 8GB iPhone (Which is plenty for my iPod, but not so sure about all the photos and stuff I take with my phone) will cost £349.99 to have, in hand, at an O2 or Carphone Warehouse store. I don’t have that kind of money. I knew it’d be pricey, but I didn’t think it’d be that pricey, considering you’ve got to pay for your credit and the excessive data charges 3G takes from you.

The tariff is quite rubbish, too. Currently, I’m on O2 Textalot - an old tariff which I should update - but is fine for what I want. 10p texts and… seemingly varying costs to call, but it’s straightforward and nice. With the PAYG iPhone, it’s different. You can only have it on Favourite Place. It’s a tariff which gives you free minutes to anyone in a certain postcode area as long as you top up £10 a month. That’s no use to me. I text people from all over the shop. It’s an extra £10 a month after the first year of owning it if you want to continue getting data access via The Cloud - The sort of wi-fi network O2 loves.

It’s not like the iPhone is that technically adept, either. I mean, it’s got a camera worse than the one on my one at the moment. It can’t record video. It can’t share pictures or video over its Bluetooth. It has no predictive text (Only half-assed sort of “You typed ‘hello’, but I assume you meant ‘zebra’” corrective texting). If the O2 website is anything to go by, visual voicemail won’t work on PAYG, which is one awesome feature I do like on the iPhone, which is different to every other phone.

It’s £400 for a 16GB version of the iPhone, which you might as well get if you’re willing to pay £350 for an 8GB one. They’re kind enough to give you 10% of your top-ups back from the last 18 months if you’re already an O2 customer, and the Carphone Warehouse will probably do a trade-in offer for the handset, but that won’t make a dent in the overall cost of the thing. Maybe I’ll wait until it comes down in price, or buy a new iPod touch when they come out on the 9th September… allegedly.

So it depends whether you want to pay £639 for 18 months of iPhone lovin’ on contract, or £350 + whatever you spend on calls, texts and data for 12 months iPhone lovin’, it’s up to you. Or, you could just get a completely different phone, and have me just waste 5 minutes of your life reading this. Either or.

Although I complained (a lot), this summer has gone insanely quick. It seems like just 5 weeks ago, giving Simon a manly handshake to go off to Camp Hawkeye. Wait, it was…

It’s a training day at NSB today, which means there’s beavers in the office sorting out our timetables, which have lovingly came out on the school’s little system. Here’s mine:

So yeah. The general consensus is that this year’s timetables suck more than last year. No more Tebbutt or Youles.They’ve been replaced by Peck (Who I’ve never had, and thought was just a permanent Sixth Former until last year) and Meenan (Who I’ve also never had, but he’s just generally a legend. Anyone who has their own Facebook appreciation society is fine by me. :)).

So come 7am tomorrow morning, Jagger and Woody will be waking me up for the next 179 days, if exams start around the same time as this year. There’s hardly even a bank holiday or a teacher training day to look forward to until the 23rd February.

So I’ll be stuck, with people I never talk to, with teachers I’ve never had, in a subject I’d rather not be in. Yay. Go NSB.

Who remembers Um Bongo? I loved that stuff. It was actually the best drink of the 90s. For you young people or foreigners, Um Bongo was a tropical juice drink which was amazingly lush. I have a fond memory of going around this housing estate area in the back of our old red Ford Escort, trying to pierce the carton with the weird extendable straw, only to end up with it all in my lap. Silly Matt.

But I go onto YouTube, only to be told that they don’t stock it anywhere in the UK any more. Now I’m shocked. I was annoyed when they stopped stocking Golden Grahams, but a lovely childhood drink should not be simply stripped from the shelves.

So yeah. Anyone who works in a supermarket or, indeed, any sort of food and drink shop, tell your manager guy to start selling Um Bongo. It’s amazing.

First there was the true Crappy Game for Simon. All you needed to do was start the game to instantly lose. It rocked. But then it got more serious - With games with such lucrative titles such as “MySpace Mania” and “Mis-dress Mabel”. Some have had the threats of Lil’ Chris singing to you if you don’t complete the game.

But this one is in an entirely different league. This one, my friends, is about shooting Richy B in the eye with an arrow.

You know Richy B, right? He’s the legend that makes sounds with his similies. Haha. Wow.

The game actually centres around an in-joke with me and Jack (and a couple of others), where he said something was “Like being shot in the eye with an arrow”, followed by an eccentric scream which can only be written down as “ARGH! ARRRRRGGGGHHHH! ARRRRGH!” whilst covering the eye with your hands.

And that’s what this game is about. Shoot Richy B in the eye as many times as possible during the minute. During that time, you can shoot rebel people with knives for an extra two points, but don’t shoot the innocent bystander - That’ll lose you 5 points.

So yeah. PLAY NOW.

I apologise there’s no high score thing and… no way to turn the music off, but I’m sure you can get over that.

My top score is 78 points, with a shooting speed of 3480rbph. Can you beat me?

1. John doesn’t like high heels.

2. Waitrose are too good for me.

3. The Natural Confectionary sweets are amazing.

4. None of my regular blog readers are Christian.

5. There will be no Miss Nun 2008.