We’ve known each other for quite a while now. In fact, ever since you took over Safeway’s shops, there’s always been a bit of you around everywhere. You’re useful when you’re 24 hours and I need a tin of beans.
Although you do get on my wick sometimes.
I went to you in Poole about an hour ago to get some beans and some milk. You’d think you could just supply me that service and let me leave. Oh no, you and your smarmy sales tactics led me to buy some cocktail sausages. Cocktail sausages. I mean really. Why would you want to sell a hungry, skint student some cheap, pre-cooked sausages? …oh right.
I only picked them up because the nice little label above them said £1. I thought "£1 for that many sausages? I’ll have them! Covered in barbeque sauce, they’ll be nice!"
I get to your self-service terminal-type things, and after it’s constantly told me there’s an unexpected item in the bagging area, you tell me these sausages were £3. £3 to a student is a lot. That’s like a whole week worth of breakfast gone in the form of small portions of pork.
Now you know me, I’m too shy to hunt down someone and ask them to take my cocktail sausages off of my list, so I just went ahead and got them – after all, I was quite looking forward to them now. Those cocktail sausages cost more than the rest of my shopping combined. So do you know what I did?
Yeah. I got back and ate them. I was going to eat all of them just to show you that I didn’t care, but I physically couldn’t. They’ll stay in the fridge with my Savers cheese and cans of Tango until I feel the need to pinch one again.
I thought you’d grown out of that whole mis-pricing game, ASDA. Trying to trick innocent students out of their hard… urm… hard-borrowed cash? Despicable. You tried to do that to me when I was buying the sweets for my last Boy’s Brigade meeting, remember?
So clean up your act please, ASDA. I know you can find it in your heart to correctly price things on your shelves.
Much tiny bit of love,
Matt.
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